People Hurt People.

Rule number one: people hurt people.

Rule number two: people don't hurt people intentionally.

Rule number three: good or bad, a decision has to be made.

Rule number four: don't let these decisions make you or break you.
Rule number five: you will hurt people too.

You'd think that we'd know by now how to deal with a situation, how to see the end before it begins. If we did then you'd never get hurt, but of course, life isn't that kind.
Just for once I'd like things to work out like the movies, you know an opening montage that shows your life up to this moment, then a fade screen to your day to day life, there'd be some cheesy music whilst you're working out or just getting through your day, and then you'd meet someone and know it was meant to be because there'd be some dramatic and yet wonderful music to tell you so. Things would go wrong and you'd hurt each other, but then there'd be that one shining moment where one of you admits your mistake and then there'd be a big romantic gesture telling you that they're the one. The screen would fade to black and there'd be some dramatic ballad like Your Love is King or anything by Adele...

           But no. Life is not a movie. 

Life is really confusing and unlike school you get the test first then the lesson later; and to be honest most of the time you don't even know you're sitting the test until you've taken it. And then you spend a while trying to figure out what it's taught you; if it's even taught you anything. Most of the time you don't understand the lesson until some time has passed, and you can look back and say wow, okay that wasn't meant for me just then.

I'm one of those people who can give good advice but seldom do I follow it. In fact, I can't remember a time I've ever followed my own advice.. it's amazing how often you can put yourself in other people's shoes and figure out a situation but when you're suddenly there you just forget any advice and go 'I can't do this'. Lucky for me, I am surrounded by a group of wonderful friends that can get me through any situation. As cliche as it sounds, a problem shared is a problem halved. And I know that sometimes it feels as if the universe is conspiring against you and sometimes you can try to hard to make something work that it just works against you. And I think that sometimes its all about striking a balance between knowing when to keep going & when to quit...
Maybe walking away and quitting is the bravest thing in the world to do.

It's raining now but it can't rain forever.

There are some people in this world that you just love, and they can't do anything to make you think otherwise. And even if you want to walk away, you try to but you can't. So you just keep building bridges with them. They do you wrong and they apologise and you forgive them; deep down, they're not bad people. Deep down they're good people. But sometimes good people make bad decisions & they hurt the people they should be loving. Only you can decide when to walk away. When they hurt you, you have a choice.

a) forgive them and move on
or
b) decide to walk away.

If you decide to forgive them and move on then you can't throw it back in their face next time you have an argument, or keep reminding them of it, because lets face it. You've told them what they did is forgiven.
But if you decide to walk away then make sure that is the choice you definitely want to make; tell them the reason why. Tell them that they hurt you and this decision is to stop yourself feeling worse then you already do. Tell them that time can heal. But you have to do this for yourself right now.
One important thing, all this hurt that you're going through, just remember that you will do all this to someone one day too. So be kind, the world is full of unkind people, don't be another one of them.

You are strong. You are loved. You are a warrior. You are a princess. You are a hero. You have your shit together. You can choose who hurts you.
You can choose to walk away from any situation that no longer serves you, makes you grow or that simply makes you hurt.

And maybe this is the best thing about being human, that you can just walk away.
That you can just say goodbye to people who you need to say goodbye to.
That in one shining moment you can choose to change your life.

People do hurt people.

But people also love people.
And that may be the best thing of all.

         

The thoughts and ramblings of a twenty something dealing with life, love and all the crappy bits in between.

Hello, I'm Liz. I'm twenty three and I've just recently graduated with an MA in history; and I 'm about to break the unwritten truth about people who have twice graduated Uni...

I have no idea what I'm going to do with my life

Shocking isn't it? You have this grand plan at seventeen and then once you get into your twenties you realise life isn't that easy nor straightforward. Sometimes people change, things go wrong, the people who you always thought would be there for you suddenly aren't, and you realise that people hurt people both intentionally and unintentionally.

But there's also good stuff...wonderful, amazing things.
That kiss that makes your heart skip a beat.
Adventures with your best friends, seeing new places.
Laughing until your stomach hurts.
Falling in love & out and back in again.
Making the best friends you've ever had.
New opportunities.
Realising that you are actually quite happy with how your life is.

All these experiences, good or bad, make a person. 

That's what this blog is dedicated to, charting all the ups and downs of a twenty something.

Dealing with love, life, relationships and all the crappy things in between.
It's gonna be one hell of a ride.